I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
If you had to guess, would you say that as a species, midgets are more or less flammable than humans?
Less. Duh. They have less combustible mass.
i think i just was awoken by the sound of my roommate choking on her boyfriend's dick
don't you miss freshman year when you could get away with "but i've never given a bj before..."
Its... i dont even know. theres lots of rap music and i cant find my shoes
You call it a hangover, I call it a baby squirrel burrowing its way out of my head.
Congrats. You are not detrimental enough to my psyche to be discussed during this mornings therapy appointment. Please follow up next week to see if you made the cut.
We should totally stay in at new years, have sex and try to time orgasm to the countdown
Just saw the trailer for Spike Lee's version of Oldboy. They filmed a lot of it in A's building so like every scene features a place where I had or almost had sex. If oral counts then pretty much every scene.
As planned I took it to the limit. Then we met a new limit. Now they are limit friends.
He told me if he passed out to wake him by sitting on his face, and if he suffocated at least he would die happy. Found the one.
I'm sorry that running around town like a frenetic wombat trying to find you KY jelly isn't good enough for you.
PLEASE LET MY BIRD FUCK YOUR BIRD
no offense but you looked like shit yesterday
tequila is unforgiving..
Came up to an intersection and someone was blasting My Chemical Romance at like 9 AM. They're DEFINITELY having a good day
Randomize
