Sometimes I wonder if we could be friends if we lived closer.
and next time when you feel me up, do it right
We've had the 'life would be so much better if we were both lesbians' conversation too much for that to be okay.
I am sweating out the vodka to make room for the whiskey tonight.
knew it was a bad idea. the look she gave me when i left her roommates bedroom in the morning really illustrated that.
please visit steve this weekend, he is getting mature and responsible and shit which scares me.
My goal of the day is to not shit myself. That's it. Setting the bar real low
Do you know what's great about Canada?..... There will always be a Tim Hortons on my walk of shame route
isnt this the same guy you hooked up with on his birthday and he then asked, "you were at me birthday?" the next time you were together?
I told him he was probably the first guy to get fucked while wearing Star Wars pyjamas.
Male strippers are involved. You are coming
No we are not "bros" because I came out of my moms vagina& you went in there.
at least I have the sex noises of his roommate to entertain me while I wait for him to wake up
Do they still have sex clubs in San Francisco? Because that'd be an interesting way to spend Easter.
Buying a new bed right now. My options are limited because I need to be able to be tied to it.
Randomize
