party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
Not just anyone can homewreck on three continents simultaneously
you are my hero
I just wanted to say sorry for trying to jack off your dog last night.
We're too lazy too send a pic of out balls. Just assume this is a pic of our balls and respond accordingly.
CHAZ BONO WILL BE ON THE NEXT SEASON OF DANCING WITH THE STARS.
Internet Is back!
MY NEWS TRUMPS YOURS.
Well Its not like I planned having my potato launcher explode and burn off my eyebrow and eye lashes.. I still have my right eyebrow can't u just be happy?
They usually take it with their boobs. It's like a horizontal motorboat
Girl it's 3:30 get your life together and come enjoy a bowl, some coffee and a brownie with me
Please tell me I didn't try to make out with a 70 year old Romanian man last night ...
Awkward is sitting in your parking spot and making eye contact with every one of your next door neighbors two hours before you have a threesome.
My mom told me to get it out of my system now bc once I hit 30 it's not acceptable to get "white girl wasted".
We need to get Harry and Lloyd's tuxedos from Dumb and Dumber. I feel like this is a vital thing that is missing from our lives.
WE ARE DOOMED.
And not the good kind of doomed. Assuming there is one.
it isn't the robot apocalypse that's for sure
not sure if actually covered in glitter or just drunk
Call me a snob but I'm not banging chicks with more fingers than teeth.
Randomize
