I was just curling my hair topless and I just burned my nipple. Ouch.
it's like i warped into dreamland and the only thing that makes sense is my solo cup
just shaved my legs at the gas station bathroom before going to the club. is that too ghetto?
We got drunk before dinner. People at the other tables were praying for us.
It's a big world.....someone has to fuck it.
There was a canoe full of alcohol. It was literally a boat load of fun
I made my rape whistle into a roach clip device. FRESHMAN YEAR!
The fact that I found him in his Ninja Turtles t-shirt next to six empty and obviously consumed packs of EasyMac watching reruns of Becker certainly made telling him that I wanted a divorce so much easier than I had planned.
I hope you realize, I'm counting on you as my wingman next semester. It's your turn to advertise another man's penis. I did my tour all freshman year.
I would have done it. But then again I am a starving student who can manipulate my brain into thinking my decision was somehow morally justifiable.
Apparently from about 3-5AM I was consoling that crying stripper about her life choices.
How does she have a hairless cat and a husband it's not fair. Both are hard to come by
I couldn't fall back asleep it was too bright so I just took my sports bra off and put it over my eyes
Well sort of got busted by a cop while having sex outside, so your call
There's a fine line between kinky and serial killer
Randomize
