I swear she didn't look like that last week.
I work with a guy that has a strong spanish accent. He just said "I have a plethora of ..." and I busted out into laughter b4 he finished his sentence b/c it reminded me of 3 amigos.
i have it on good authority that she is not as good at giving head as she claims she is
He told me the hand job I gave him this morning was "lovely".
A-plus on my thesis. I deserve the blowjob to end all blowjobs. And I wanna wear a crown while you do it.
just spent the last 4 hours covering his room in sticky notes. Viva Drunk Thursdays.
She called to say she's single and blow job season is back.
I could barely talk to the cabbie and I was text bombing everyone. They need to make an auto timer app to prevent people like me from belligerent late night harrassing. And I was seeing double... Prob would have tried to give your leg a bj and then fallen down the stairs.
I would rather burn my vagina off with a damn flame thrower before I would touch anything that has touched her skank ass.
You had your shirt off checking IDs at the door and you don't even work there
I just woke up under my desk. Not to worry though, no one is in the office yet
god it feels good to gold a bottle of opiates again.
I think that typo was actually more appropriate than what you intended.
I should probably drink beer instead of rum today so I don't end up naked in my living room while I still have guest.
it'll be okay! And just think of this ultrasound as the most action you've had in a month...
he was like tryna hang and chat and I was like dude there's an iguana in this room
Randomize
