If it wasnt for meatballs I would have fucking killed myself already.
ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
so I smoked with the leasing agent of the apartment complex. Of corse I am going to take this one
That girl you went home with last night was dressed in a bright blue sweats at the bar. 205lb Smurffete FTL. Boy were you in epic form.
People are suprisingly accepting of someone doing a walk of shame in a toga...
I woke up with a new Tiffanys necklace on. I'm such a classy drunk.
He just yelled in the bar, "So I stuck it in two girls butts, why are you bringing that up now?"
How do people deal with hangovers? I literally want to eat my own face.
Sober now. I'm really glad I didn't try to make out with that guy who has a pregnant fiance
I still have way too many Frat houses to get blackout drunk at before I'm get in any type of relationship
I seriously want to say to him "Do you know how many blow jobs you could have gotten this summer?"
I just masterbated to the Lets Get Ready To Rumble theme
Puked in my purse on my Uber ride home last night. Safe to say it's not a good idea to beer bong a whole bottle of wine.
While he was fucking me, he just stopped and said, "Mike says Hi." Then proceeded to fuck me.
What did you do?
What do you say to that!? But, when I came, I screamed out my full name.
scale of one to ten how loathsome is it to save my chocolate easter bunny to use for a topping on my edibles
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