Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
what happened last night??
everyone saw ******'s vagina
and that's just the beginning
I puked off the balcony.
Not horrible
Into the hottub. There were six people in it. I had eaten all their pizza.
she was so wasted that she tried to tuck me in and read the jokes on the taco bell sauce as a bed time story
its 9am and we're in an escalade. I have no shoes and my dress is on backwards. I feel like we're the morning after a rap video
Just got back from my 9:00 am class to find my roommate soaking her lifesaver gummies in vodka so she can have them for a snack in class later.
Nada. Shooting off confetti and wanted to see I'd u could see it from ur house.
Wow. Its not even 11am.
You haven't puked in my sink in over a year.. Youre coming over this weekend
as she was beating the hell out of his ex, she screamed prison rules, and smashed her head with a beer bottle. I'm oddly afraid yet so attracted to her now.
The only thing that made me get out of bed this morning was knowing that tonight, I don't plan on remembering what happened today
Did you just send me an ass picture with a quote from the lion king?
What are you gonna do about it?
No worries I have vodka. Its always on time
Great news. I WILL BE FUCKING IN A BOUNCY HOUSE TOMORROW.
It might look like I curled my hair last night but it's just the jiz.
Ill try not let guys feel my boobs for free drinks next time, no promises tho. I am my boyfriends worst nightmare.
Randomize
