will power is for people who don't want to get laid
she went to pee and i could hear her singing "Drip Drip Drop LIttle April Showers" from Bambi through the door.
Is being a pregnant whore worse than an average one?
is he apposed to sex in general? or just porch sex?
How drunk are u on a scale of one to couldn't get it up if u had a gun at ur head?
Do you know how I hurt my ankle or my shoulder? Or the origin of any of the following mystery bruises: left quad, left wrist, right elbow. Thanks for playing.
dont iron anything. we fucked on the ironing board. details to follow.
How do you respond to a booty call from yesterday?
We need to make tonight low-budget
Is this your way of suggesting flasks?
I'm daydrinking whiskey in a princess hat
I think I just did my first walk of shame. He sent me home with a watermelon from his farm. Southern one night stands.
Bourbon is too strong for my cat, he does not want to drink it
My cat just tried to lay on my stomach while I was masturbating. And I let her because I am so starved for affection.
Help I accidentally unlocked this guy's tragic backstory and I need a rewind button!
My parents are being so annoying about my colon.
Randomize
