Everytime I think about NYE, my gag reflex kicks in.
You tired to make Beefaroni in the Mr. Coffee machine.
During sex he wiggled his hips and said "I'm turning the ice cream" Deal breaker?
Night out in new white coat = success. Offered free breast exams all night, two took me up on it, woke up with one. I love medical school!!!
On the plus side I got to ride in a fire truck and I didn't have to blow anybody for it
I just had cybersex with some guy from the Netherlands for 2 HOURS instead of doing my History project...how's your break going?
Next time he asks to wax your nipple while you're passed out I promise I'll be sober enough to intervene.
So last night I learned something new. Whenever I drink beer out of a bottle a random guy buys me another one. It was like as soon as the glass hit my lips every guy in a 20ft radius got a hard on.
Yes I slept with him, he was the only one not wearing a costume. Guys with costumes are just trying to impress you.
Fun fact. I am at the police dept. getting served a warrant for unpaid ordinance... and the officer was a one night stand from like 10 years ago.
I don't want a baby! I JUST WANT AN ORGASM THAT ISN'T SELF INFLICTED.
One small step for man, one big gay fierce leap for gays!
I would say I miss her friendship, then I remember that she gave 4 guys the clap. I'm good.
Whatever, ill dance on the bar at applebees, don't try and act like you're above it.
They're doing CPR to someone in the middle of Victoria's Secret. Way to block the undies, damnit!
Randomize
