he wasnt completely random
you're right. you met him once and didnt know his name. you still dont
i get things done.
Got laid at the last second. Facebook chat is good for something afterall.
Apparently senior citizens don't like that position
I just had a Brazilian done for this guy. He's getting first-date sex whether he wants it or not.
4 months of living in europe has taught me the art of making a drunken stumble look like a dance move
I totally just found ecstasy floating around in the bottom of my purse, it's almost like good karma from the time I lost that blow...but not quite
Yes stubble LOOKS hot but factor in his shitty bj skills and I might as well have jacked off with apricot scrub
Kid got laid mid-party wearin a fuzzy hat with ears and 40's taped to his bear paws... wtf
You could make a naked club. One member, you. One president, you.
We are trying to penis chicken awkward them out. But I think it's a gay wedding. Backfiring. Heavily.
At least I got steroids and a baguette out of the deal
Oh, I also stabbed a guy Friday and he still asked me out
After round two, I told him he deserves an award. He bowed and did a princess wave WHILE his dick was still inside me.
You rolled over grabbed my crotch and said "that's my waffle." I'm sleeping on the couch next time.
27 year olds can still do oral in a car right? Or is that trashy?
Randomize
