I am at The Loft in SoNo, and there are two girls within arms reach that are making out with each other AGGRESIVELY. Like I can see 100% of a boob
For future reference, this is Trevors little sisters phone now. Trevs number is 484 XXX XXXX. Great story tho
I'm in that akward stage between jailbait and cougar
in the middle of it he kept shouting: im going to be masturbating to this for the rest of my life
Dude a guy just showed up with alcohol and a bag of double cheese burgers. I think I found my future husband.
I would just like you to know that the guy I blew off last weekend to come find ur drunk ass just got drafted into the major leagues.
Moment of silence for the loss of that option.
This dude is being a total douche
Just because it's Christmas Eve does not mean the liquor store has to give you a free bottle of peppermint schnapps
He screamed "Hug me!" and dove into the bushes. How he gets laid every weekend is beyond me.
the only consolation to the fact that i puked in public today was that i did it down a storm drain... so at least i am a responsible public puker
Dude you went around coming up behind people and whispering in their ears. I dont know what you said but they looked terrified when you left.
He used one of his curtains as a leash and hand restraints. He wins the creative sex challenge hands down.
I mean like, I missed 30 minutes of star wars to fuck you on Christmas so you must be worth something
I just made myself orgasm twice and Laura lee hit 4 million subscribers. It’s a good day everywhere
I let a 30 year old guitar player that works at a call center go down on me in his backseat last night
yeah i ran into him at the bar at 11pm. he started talking about engineering and the next thing i know it's 4am and i'm naked on top of him.
Bro, I was just laying in bed with this girl and her boyfriend came an woke me up
Randomize
