fighting downstairs. join me tonight to hear their makeup sex. also, let's make skittles vodka.
omg kevin jonas gave his bride a glass slipper..could he be any gayer then he is now
he is so gay. he makes clay aiken look straight. what is wrong with the lady that married him? kevin must be envious of her balls
I found him in the livingroom trying to soak up broken glass with the clock from the kitchen.
He's crying and calling me out on using him. It's awful. And I'm too drunk to leave.
The polaroid of me taking a test-tube of Jegar out of the gay guys mouth pretty much explains my trip to Spain.
She had me dip my balls in cake batter ice cream from cold stone and then tea bag her. Let's get weird just got a whole new meaning.
My name in their phones is "That Girl". If i can't get it to go away, I might as well live up to it.
This is the third time that ive slept with him. He bought me more milk. I can feel the romance growing.
It's like an R Kelly music video in here. Only a matter of time before someone pisses on someone
At a point I was just cumming dust last night
SOMETIMES YOU HAVE TO BLAST VANESSA CARLTON IN YOUR CAR AT MIDNIGHT TO FEEL AGAIN. IDK.
I'm experimenting with sincerity
Made it to my hair appointment on time, and got some dick. Today is already a great day
I finally got my restraining order in the mail. Was that supposed to upset me? I'm just over here like "TELLEM BOY BYE!-\nlegally..."
1. I drank goldschlager 2. I fell in a bathtub and hit my head (hard) on a soap dish. 2. I sat in said bathtub talking to a random stranger on vacation from wyoming (who i met at a 711 looking for taquitos) for almost an hour. 3. We got kicked out of said bathtub by owner of bathtub. 4. We had sex.
Randomize
