The look your mother gives you when she sees you masterbating on web cam is unlike any I've seen before, but this is a case where, I would say, ignorance is bliss.
90 In a 65. Talked my way out of it with the i have to poop story. i am the ticket jesus
So tasty. Tasty like a vagina with ninjas in it
using blue streamers we found on the bathroom floor was probably not the best substitute for toilet paper.
great idea involving lots of fake blood and face paint, call me tomorrow.
Power hour was a bad idea. It turned into power 4 hours, then power puke. Then power sleep till 3.
he made his penis look like a sprinkler when he was coming. it was pretty cool actually.
I just feel like everything is too perfect
He's probably a serial killer or chronic masturbator
Or both. Which is common
I bought new panties to console myself ... you know, because I am going to lose my ovaries. Well, if I don't die of a heart attack first. But at least when the EMS folks find me, I'll be finely dressed from the waist down.
I'm not dropping acid and watching game of thrones with you. That just sounds like a disaster waiting to happen.
Ugh I feel like I just got hit by a big giant sex bus.
Hungover. No words. Just memes.
how do you feel about japanese?
I would eat half a street meat hotdog I found on the sidewalk, I'm good with anything.
we're having rib night followed by a cultural enlightenment party
whats a cultural enlightenment party
we eat nachos and drink margaritas and tequila till we pass out
so i went over to her house and we played crash bandicoot, ate calzones, and had sex all day. im in love.
Randomize
