Remind me that when I'm pregnant, I should NOT post vaginal dilation updates on my facebook. Ever.
nothing this campus sells is worth it. not even sex.
I wiped a tear off her cheek with my boner. It cheered her up
So this shipmate of mine somehow managed to throw up in his back pocket.
Say it nicely.
Fine. I want to lovingly bend you over and lovingly fuck the shit out of you. Happy?
Any parent would be proud to have a daughter that's a blowjob fairy
I show up hung over with mcdonalds. Why wouldn't he have sex with me? It's a fucking leap year...
just peed in rthe mens room but seranaeded them with adelle the whole timee so they didnt mind
Just had sex in the darkroom, while a class was going on ten feet away. I finally have a good sex story.
His balls are like really small, like dog sized balls. It was a weird discovery. Ever done a guy with dog sized balls?
I just love it. It's warm and soft and the rest of the world is so mean. My bed would never be mean to me
the good news is that even if it's Alex's, I can still say it's Colin's, because the kid will come out ginger anyway!
who knew there'd be a plus side to your ginger fetish one day?
he taught all the little kids to ski. it was stupid hot. i'm pretty sure my ovaries exploded.
there is a smiley face on my leg painted in blood
I'm pretty sure that's yours.
It was like if the scent of sour milk and burning tires had a baby in taste form.
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