I am really glad that on the inside of a card from your grandparents you have transcribed the rules for circle of death
you kept yelling 'bird cage' in between songs and finally the lead singer stopped to ask if you meant 'free bird' and you said 'fuck you, i'm not gay', needless to say you were kindly escorted out
normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
Nhdgh I love you very much hello becausevs. Vagina pensiono
We have literally factored in $2200 for bail money in the budget. This vegas trip will be out of hand. We are signing confidentiality contracts.
You were hanging upside down on the subway with your feet in the stirrup handle bars. the children were amused.
My younger brother just got high fives from all my guy cousins for fucking my best friend. I hate family gatherings.
Sex last night was mind blowing. your wife is one lucky lady.
Pack light, we're going straight to bar from the train. No place to put our shit.
Dude all I'm bringing is my dick and a phone charger.
I asked him why I was having sex with him in the middle of having sex. It was sufficiently awkward.
According to facebook, I opened up a can of whupass on some douche who poured all the vodka on the ground.
You called the wrong number but I salute you.
It's 2pm, and I just had to pass a guy in the turning lane because he was driving down Main Street in an electric wheelchair pulling a flatbed trailer with 2 of his buddies in it and they were all drunk holding beers.
I just wanna get drunk and go sledding in my kayak
Too bad I can't un-pee in his body wash
Let's just say I peed the bed last night, and I wasn't in it alone. Whoooops
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