Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
Yeah but his hole really smells sometimes
you never know when you'll meet the man of your dreams and bang him in an elevator
I can't believe you just became a stipulation in their divorce papers.
only in a texas roadhouse would someone whistle while I was breastfeeding.
wanna tell me why theres a glass of water stuffed with tamptons in the freezer?
Sent him a picture of my pregnant boobs from last year, think he'll notice the difference?
Joined a porch party below me by climbing out the window and jumping off the roof. Tonight will be good
I'm not taking advice from anyone I've seen passed out naked at noon on the hood of a strangers car. Meaning you.
White girls? They're everywhere. In packs. Drunk white girl packs.
Do you rver get that feeling like their are poprocks filling ur boday?
My uber driver just told me I smell like fun...still drunk at 7 am
Donald Trump looks like someone photoshopped hair onto a dick pic.
She was blowing me like a porn star and all I could think was "you just told me your grandfather is dying in hospice right now"
He just brought a live lobster to the party.
Randomize