I love sluts.
I end my prayers with that every single night.
when I woke up I found a half-eaten cherry toaster strudel sandwich with bacon in the middle.
I understand Curling. That high.
I dont even clean my room anymore .. i drunk proof it for when i come back smashed with a guy
peeing on that welcome mat was like, the highlight of my week
I'll be a little late, "getting ready for the party" turned into "smoking a bowl and doing lines in my room for an hour and a half." But I'm on my way now. With coke. And weed.
I traded my shirt for vodka. I wonder if my parents can pinpoint where they went wrong raising me.
You were force feeding yourself jello and you kept repeating, "I will not surrender"
I have a surprise for you
Is it drugs? I want drugs. Or a puppy!
You know what it feels like? It feels like I'm in that prison from the dark knight rises. That's what being a virgin in college feels like.
It's 4/20 of course I'm going to smoke in the portapotty and be ripped outta my mind at the lung cancer walk.
So I just got drugs from a house with a giant cross on it. Thank you, Jesus.
I like how you were offering me $50 last night to come home with you to take care of you and your dog
I wish I had a picture of me and ron helping that stripper lick her own vagina
what the fuck happened to the tacos
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