How drunk are you??
I'm flawless.
She told me she got a 15 on her A.C.T.. that's when I knew it was a done deal.
we just watched the ball drop on the spanish channel. best mistake of my life.
At least drunk you showered before switching sex partners last night.
No that's sign language, not a drinking game. I tried to join
He was just laying on the stairs and then screamed, "Is that a clubhouse?" I haven't seen him since
Can I tell him I got herpes from your bong instead of from that guy who claimed to be an olympic diver?
Grandma is giving me marriage advice again. On the plus side, she thinks I'm straight now.
Holy shit there is too much Taco Bell here to talk to you
Shame?!? Shame only comes from getting naked in front of strangers and it not being awesome
I fell asleep masterbating while watching family guy... This is what happens when girl's night gets canceled
So, I'm a little drunk in Seattle with Glenna, but we've all agreed that it's patriotic to think about Bill Clinton from time to time during sex. 'Merica
Far be it from me to tell you where you store your dildos but from an interior decorating standpoint not fucking there
This can only be settled by a dance off.
He had a temporary tattoo of Justin Bieber on his dick and I still had sex with him
Randomize
