New first...just saw an entire family of homeless hitch hikers...kids and all. God, i love Oklahoma!
How am I a tease?
Dude you flashed me ur vagina and walked away.
ONLY PART OF IT.
we put the last xanax in the middle and played hungry hungry hippos to see whod get it
fair is fair
i ran around the party telling everyone that my favorite sexual position was also the only position that made me queef...i kept calling it the "double edged sword"
then again I'm sitting on a tree stump completely naked in the dark listening to some type of glee soundtrack.
you took my bottle from me saying i was unprepared for its magical qualities. then you buckled it in the backseat.
she gave me head while i watched the '98 Rose Bowl on espn classic. Ryan Leaf really was a huge bust
Some kids in a school bus just saw me jacking off in my car. This is how 89% of children find out about sex.
I'm gonna take off my shirt and spin it around my head like petey Pablo so u can find us�
Rule 1: If any of us dies on a trip, the other two have to 'Weekend at Bernies' the shit outta that corpse...
Wanna have a sleepover and take me to court in the morning?
Well if YOU HAVE TO KNOW, we're laying across the street from the bar on that grassy hill trying to see who's she's with at the bar.
I lost a fight last night. By that I mean I head butt the bar and busted my lip open.
last night you said that you wanted to hold my dick as you slept because it was like having a stuffed animal.
So how do u get your coat out of the coat room when someone is fucking on it?
Randomize
