I told u I don't really remember everything lol i pretty much remember not lasting as long as I norm and that I wore a condom, I hate condoms
I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
coke and sex party at dan's
im watching greys anatomy with megan...
wha-pishhh
Me liking this guy is the best diet ever. Do I want this cookie...or do I want to get laid.
She was doing lines off of her friends boobs in the limo at 9 oclock on a thursday This has the potential to be the best weekend ever
My bed is full of blood and feathers
In other news, I apparently ate my retainers while rolling last night.
Also can you rate on a scale of zero to jesus restraining order christ how creepy it is that he found a porn star that looks like me and has watched all the porn that she's been in
Reached a new low last night. Passed out. With my pants down. On the toilet. At ihop. Waitress had to wake me up.
Bitch guess who just got a fucking taser
well if they don't get here soon...no fuck it, I'm going to the strip club.
Dude of course I want to. Your penis is beautiful.
Bud... Did you mean to tweet a picture of your dick? If not just letting you know.
So today was the first day i've been sober since Wednesday according to my roommate!
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
Randomize
