Wow. 8.8 earthquake hit Chile this morning
didn't feel it. :)
It's like 5 thousand miles away of course you didn't.
wait what? so it's not in america?
I feel as if I owe my bloodstream some tequila.
I told him I wanted to have sex to "halleluiah", he suggested the poke-rap.
Its officially tradition: I black out every year on michael jackson's death day..
we are torturing ourselves with these mediocre cocks
Hm, finding a time when my drinking and your real life don't conflict could be difficult
Those were the days I had no morals... Dark times.
Shall we take a trip back?
Just got a message from a drag queen on okcupid. I cant even catfish successfully.
My life has come to reading articles about dating an ex heroin addict. I'm doing well.
I WAS SURROUNDED BY HAIRY BALLS ALL ALONE.
Stop recording sex noises and setting them as my ringtones. This time it was at a funeral
Is it unhealthy for me to do shots of pinnacle by myself in my apartment right now? Asking for a friend
You have no idea how awkward it is fucking someone with the same name as your dog
Apparently i'm now known as the kid who was double fisting tequila and pedialyte.
I went next door to get a can opener from them. They opened the door shirtless, asked me if I wanted to a smoke a joint with them. Then decided to make blueberry smoothies. But the yogurt in the blender & the berries, got confused when the berries blended into the yogurt and just kept adding more. Only stopped when we ran out of berries.
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