i wonder what barack obama's brickbreaker high score is...
Kay wants to put chicklets in our cooters to make beavers and take pix captioned Got Wood? Taking public transit does scary things to her.
I think we should see other people.
Already working on it.
I actually want to hang out with her with our clothes on. That's a big step up for me.
dude a monday night stripper made you motorboat her. you should get that checked out
when seducing a hipster, do you think taking a nude pic on a lomo-camera app would increase my chances? grainy off-colored boobs and telling him how much i like reading salinger?
So much for doing Irish car bombs in my grandpa's memory.... Asshole.
You pissed off the back deck while listening to the national anthem from your phone screaming America Fuck Yea to my neighbors
We got drunk and crashed a fifty year old woman's birthday party for the food. Whoops.
Flatmate got laid for the first time in 3 years. I'm baking a cake.
PENIS EMOJIS WOULD MAKE MY LIFE SO MUCH EASIER GAH WHY DOES THE WORLD HATE ME
Also send boobie pics with bobs burgers in background its the only way to get me off anymore
His weed is so good that I don't wanna risk loosing him as my weed man so I plan to keep him in the friend zone 😂
she is legit trying to fuck me to death between her and work i haven't slept in 3 days and have at least 16 hours to go before sleep is a possibility. can i crash at your place she doesnt know where you live
My vagina measures dicks. It's accurate to the half inch.
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