i wonder why nobody wants to date me...im doing a crossword at work and asked out loud: whats a 4 letter word for 'a reason to get married?'
i was like PREG?
Ahhh... Adderall running out my nose in the shower really brings back memories.
Never let Scott cook bacon and eggs at 2am while drunk. You should have seen the flames.
ha so i just found a picture of you eating paper towels and many of Laura freaking out from it.
i keep seeing random pieces of my outfit all around town.
Yeah I'm gunna date him. I figure its regular sex and maybe feelings will come in time...it worked for arranged marriages...
This is probably the only time in my life I'm going to be able to say I'm going to the hospital too smoke weed and play Mario kart.
Or I could just give you a blow job and make it up to you.
No, that's okay. Don't worry about it.
Going once.....twice.........sold to the girl who didn't really wanna do it anyway.
Yea we slept in ur room but im 80% sure we didnt have any peanut butter in there
Also, upon examining the photos, I have concluded that you were the sloppiest drunk girl of the night. And that's saying something considering Hurricane Jessica was in town.
Nothing better than going to Mass on Easter Sunday with "I love penis" henna tattooed across your back. Love your Indian culture.
I can't remember dinner
Hahaha "rub in the ketchup on your face, It'll just look like blush." some gay waiter said that to you, and you go "good idea!"
Fucking shoot me with this y'all shit. You were in Texas for 2months you do not have an accent Madonna
Good thing my vagina doesn't have a chronometer on it. I'm sure my fiance would be horrified. Probably 10 miles from this past weekend alone.
Anyway, that's been my evening- crying and looking up diabetes symptoms. How was your night?
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