come over, blizzard of oz party. dress up.
its time for step 4 of getting over him: post his number on the transvestite page on craigs list asking for pics
Omg. One night stands are not supposed to show up to your swim class the morning after. Worst lesson ever.
She has puke on the back of her shirt not quite sure how the hell she did that
When's a good time to tell your boyfriend you've slept with his ex girlfriend?
Is it true if I say your name three times, you'll appear and whore everything up?
If you value your immune system buddy, walk away from that one.
I think it's starting to become crucial that I find a companion for my vagina.
Well apparently I decided it was easier I piss in the trash can at waffle house than In the toilet. Would've been ok if the trash can was in the bathroom.
She just asked what would happen if you put a vacuum in your butt and turned it on. These are our conversations.
My Dicks been hard all day. Poor guy isn't used to vacation being over
She swallowed the key to the cuffs, I've been having to explain the pink fuzz all morning.
I somehow turned head, shoulders, knees, and toes into a sobriety test
These are the things that make me so grateful... that I slept with your sister instead.
Come on in. I'm butt naked, in the kitchen, eating ice pops
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