shes got a 6th sense for me cheating...the the hailey joel osmound of me getting bjs
Is it sanitary to roast marshmallows over a cigarette lighter?
I just did my online traffic school at the bar. No biggie.
once you have herpes you dont really care what goes in your mouth anymore.
I remember tearing his shower curtain down but I don't remember trying to shave my vag...
lit a joint with my parents wedding matches today, this is what happens when you're out of lighter fluid. didnt even feel guilty.
You have to figure out where to put this turtle dude
Just took an adderall with a shot of tequila while doing my makeup in the parking lot at work before I go in. I'm also late. They're so lucky to have me.
I called her 20 times. Apparently she went home to do MORE shots before bed. Didnt miss me until this morning. WHO FORGETS THEIR HIGHSCHOOL SISTER AT A FRAT?
Well for starters the people who just made my burger at the grab and go just told me to "hang in there"
I woke up to find his roommate face down on the couch with no pants on, with a sticky note that said "was lost but now am found"
You're the third person who's asked me for an afternoon blow connection in one day. Unreal.
That's more of a you-issue than a me-issue
the cops accepted 42 wallaby way Sydney. and the cops, and cab driver accepted the new address. please tell the win i am experiencing
Why does your life consist of lesbians, black guys and cats?
Ate his Chinese food and drank his beer and played with his chihuahua. All while wrapped in a towel while he was sleep.
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