i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
I'm curled up in a ball on the floor of my office with the lights off. I hope no one notices. No more open bar. Woof.
I just had sex with a black guy. He told me I had a big dick. I think that's God's way of saying it's okay to be gay.
you busted in the room, ripped the covers off of us, ... and fist pumped
1. I feel like Jello 2. The girl i hooked up with last night isn't here and a different girl is lying next to me. 3. I have no clothes on 4. Can guys go on walks of shame?
I think the fact that my first kiss is now in a porno says a lot about why my life is the way it is
you started putting condoms on anything with a point, then you were yelling at the lamp for using your last condom...
Tell him I thought his Superman stand on your bed and cum all over your back was quite funny
I gotta find new tactics tho. There's just so many tied up dicks one can look at before part of your soul dies.
You told me to remind you that the bruise on your ass is from when you danced on the table at Ziggy's, saw a cop and tried to 'fly away'.
Beautiful wedding. Beautiful bride. I got shitfaced. Came home and ate two corndogs. I'm still single.
It's was about average. But he had a tat on his thigh that said "pull-out n' rollout" so I won't have to worry about a round two request.
when a dude sends me an unwanted dick pic I just send him a picture of a nicer one. A more photogenic one. A dick with a future.
He seduced me by making me nachos. It worked.
Its not that hard to understand he's my holiday boyfriend, we ignore each other most of the year except on holidays when I give him head
Randomize