do you believe in love at first sight?
awwwwww =)
yea.. so can i have your sisters number? thanks!
so while trying to be a healthier drunk i discovered that putting airborne in natty is not an advisable decision
she actually told me to ignore the cokeheads in the corner with knives.
My mom assumed I was crying because he was leaving. Figured that was better than explaining my eye's sensitivity to semen..
well the first picture of me in 2011 involves a viking helmet and chugging champagne. i like this year already.
It's cheaper then a lap dance and you get your hair cut.
Dude she hit me with my own penis and it hurt. I've never been cock slapped but she slapped me with my own cock so it has to be worse.
We are buying drugs from a guy with a Jesus fish on his dodge caravan.
So immediately after we finished having sex she started singing, "The Circle of Life", put her clothes on and then just left. I think I'm in love.
I need something for rope burns and an inner ear infection. Separate incidents, FYI..
I rocked his world in the back of my car in an overly-lit, heavily trafficked parking lot. Middle age is amazing!
He brought me flowers and then spanked me with a Doctor Who paddle. Pretty good night, as these things go.
Awwwwwww!
It's 7am. I'm making pizza & watching the Matrix. I will not be bothered.
To answer your next question, yes, I'm drunk.
This girl was in the river screaming that someone didn't love her anymore...that's when the guy in a kilt claimed her...
He tried to eat me out...through my pants.
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