He about cried when I ordered pizza online. He said it was a miracle.
you were asking all the dicks on chatroulette if they had daddy issues
we banged on the home plate. i wasnt even aware of the significance of where we were until afterwards hahaha
His whole family saw that I had cum in my hair once they turned on the blacklight at the bowling alley. You should have seen his mother's face.
This guy either needs to stop touching me or buy me another drink.
Hey is there a picture of me in a trash can on your phone?
He taught me where the gears in a five speed are with his penis.
Def something wrong w taking plan b with your daughters juice box
The guy at the rodeo just told me "if ya don't say none, ya don't get none". What the hell does that mean?
Im pretty sure you just got hit on by a gay cowboy.....
I've had sex near too many of the blankets to let our parents touch them like this
I just need some breakup sex yanno like filthy wish fulfilling breakup sex to make me forget what I never had
I'm only coming over if you have cocaine or a snickers bar
I just loudly threatened to kill a self checkout machine
Fucked him in a graveyard. Need plan b.
Lies! You took my virginity, and now my cigarettes!
Randomize
