a mothers knocking is a guaranteed boner softener
I told her it just looked small because my balls were gigantic. She bought it.
Made out with some random "plus sized" young lady. She let me kiss her boobies. It was like I was 6 months old again.
Her parents came home early, i had to hug her mom with a condom on...
I feel I need to conquer him. He's six ft eight and 265lbs. Its like the mount Everest of sex.
come in to starbucks and ill make you a 4loko latte before theyre banned
all i know is that i listed him in my phone as 'vagina cookies.' that can only be a good thing.
Why i have shady connections. Owner just txt me asking to come by and judge the new stripper.
Got so drunk in South Padre some guy put me on a suitcase trolly and pushed me to my room. I flashed my boobs as a tip.
I think you're too young for vagina rejuvenation but I guess you have never been one to listen. Sounds good! You bring the Percocet ill bring the vodka!
You kept trying to make people drink "salsa-ritas." But all you did was dump tequila in a half full jar of salsa, and shove it in people's faces while shouting at them.
Okay. This morning the comforter was wet, you were underwearless and using a tiny blanket. What'd you do??
If she didn't block me, she would have known that I sneezed on her toothbrush.
I've got a surprise in the fridge when you get back.
Is it a puppy?
It was probably the night you were half naked and trying to blow everybody, guy or girl.
this is me we're talking about here. You're going to have to be more specific than that.
Randomize
