Do you remember last night at all? Be honest
I need to look at the pictures on my camera to fill in the gaps.
He like poked it twice with the tip of his tongue then left it alone. I'm sad.
I have before 2 am pics and after 2am pics, which do you want to see first?
This whole living in Ohio thing is getting reaaaaallly old.
Next time we go to the river, we nominate you to flash people for free booze. Your tits are the biggest.
Spent 200 bucks on a stripper for a good night hug. I give up.
Im pretty sure that girl just said "Im taking you home even if your girlfriend has to come too." Why are we here again?
I'm in the fetal position watching the little mermaid and trying not to die. When do you come home?
I'll be thirty in eight months. I think my goal is too stop changing my pants in the parking lot at work by then.
I just Miyagied my roommate through her first set of tit pics. Her fuck buddy owes me.
How much do souls cost? I feel like I need one if those.
Girl you're stalking so hard you're gonna know both their social security numbers soon
i found you laying on the floor staring at the ceiling and you kept muttering "why" in various inflections.
She shaved her vagina in my bed. Good night
After drinking all day I popped an adderal, slammed three beers in a row, apparently told the bartender "thanks bitch" then ran on stage.
Randomize
