Evryone should know as good ramen noodle cooked in beer sounds... its not
I wish i could go to google and type in drug dealers and it would bring up a number, a product and direction
i feel sorry for the hotel staff that makes the bed after we have sex
My mom just said we needed to put weed into our earthquake kit.
Either you made a spaghetti vodka smoothie last night, or you puked in the blender.
I am going to make your legs soar from cumming so much
Like they're going to fly away?
I have come to realize that my purpose in life is less musical and more as a filter of alcohol into water.
How do you think the people in my class would react if I ripped all my clothes off and jumped on him right now?
how are things with the new girl?
good, we have nothing in common but she likes being choked
Which one of you fuckers thought itd be funny to see if the kitchen table can float.
I found your Halloween costume. I think you shit yourself last night
Under no circumstances is tits McGee to make that kind of decision about my life!
FYI, his "son" is a Chihuahua.
Ever look at an ex and wonder...was I drunk that entire relationship??
Yes, yes I do.
Can’t. Tonight’s a netflix and dick night
Randomize
