its good she wears the same dress to all the weddings so we can track how fat she's really gotten
so glad i banged her when she was skinny
I think you're the first person to ever call Louisville, KY a "romantic getaway".
you jizzed all over me and yelled "makeover"
I just remember getting him back by licking the window on his truck.
I bought a zebra print bikini, I'm gonna be honest here- if he doesn't want to have sex with me in this, he's gay.
Like... Chilling at home with a movie, hang out? Or have sexual intercourse in the backseat if his car, hang out?
i'm sitting pantsless eating potato chips and watching porn before he picks me up for our date. I hope he's ready for this...
I was riding her and she yelled "fuck me" then someone in the room next door yelled "you don't have to say it if youre doing it."
My going away gift was all of them dancing around with solo cups on their dick and balls...these are my friends
Dude, you can't even imagine the trip, I actually thought that there were Care Bears sitting next to me at the bar, I'm pretty sure I started hitting on the pink one.
Also, just woke up in a Romney tank and sequin flag panties. Merica.
If I could go one week without being called a maneater or a spanish trolip that would be great.
At least I got steroids and a baguette out of the deal
Who brings nunchucks to a funeral?
The bartender remember my drink from last sat. I think we just became drocals...drunk. locals.
Randomize
