Maybe if i eat something filling like whole wheat pasta it will make me less hungry for things like dick
I kinda knew it wasnt going to pan out when he would rather watch how i met your mother ON TIVO than fuck me......
pop tarts are not kleenex
had a convo with my professor before class while peeing... new level of awkward or a breakthrough in our relationship? i feel like there is no longer a professional boundary.
Why was I handcuffed to the roof?
It was easier then trying to explain why you couldn't fly
everyone contributed. i held her hair back, he rubbed my vag... it was a team effort.
well apperantly i passed out on the stairs shouting "victory".
He bought me dinner. He gave me his jacket when I was cold. And then ate me out in the passenger sear of the car.
Was last night real? Did I lick your forehead while you laid in between my legs while we laid next to your boyfriend?
Hey. I can't work your space dryer so I'm wearing your blanket home. I'll get my clothes later. Fun party!
I hope you gays don't get too crazy after DOMA. Gay divorces aren't any better than straight ones.
You slept on a pillow of digiorno
I hope. Last year I got lost in New Orleans and some guy named Cookie walked me home while I cried.
a homeless man let us know that my friend was asleep in the bushes outside my house on main street. So just a small get together.
Listen gotta draw the line somewhere. Apparently that line is at my nuts.
Randomize
