I am drunk raised to the nth degree. The possibility of getting sick is approaching infinity.
His facebook profile says he's interested in men, but i'm choosing to ignore that
Honey, If i waited till marriage I wouldnt know what a dick tasted like.
she's basically destroyed all of the faith i had that skinny blond girls could be a functioning part of society.
the protein jug says add 2 scoops to your favorite beverage. guess who just found a way to make sam adams healthy? THIS GUY
it will be an insanely irresponsible summer.the only things i plan on not doing are dying and getting pregnant.and even those are negotiable
Hospital. He tried giving some kid a stone cold stunner during a real fight.
This is the high leading the old right now
Dude, seduce him with cookies. You almost turned me gay with scones. Don't be surprised when they get you laid.
I want "hickeys on my ass" sex
It's going to be so weird waking up tomorrow morning fully rested completely sober and not covered in piss or bruises.
I WANT TO. I JUST IMAGINE HIS BEAUTIFUL BLONDE HEAD INBETWEEN MY LEGS AND I BREAK DOWN AND START CRYING.
WE SHOULD MAKE A WORKOUT ROUTINE CALLED BARCARDIO
I'm facebook/twitter stalking the guy I just slept with as he's passed out next to me. What a time to be alive...
my poor anus
Randomize
