We're playing Big Buck Hunter to determine who buys the next pitchers. And they said video games wouldn't help me later in life
Im a photoshop master, i successfully reduced the size of the pupils of all the girls I made out last night with to prove they were not that drunk. So glad the camera goes home with me.
This girl in the gym has an amazing body...too bad there's no workout routine for a face.
i finally found my car by the hideout. it was parked in an employee only parking space with a torn up piece of paper in the back window with the word employee scribbled on it.
I DON'T CARE WHAT THE CIRCUMSTANCES ARE NEVER VOMIT IN MY PURSE AGAIN.
i just snorted adderall with my patient's rolled up EKG strip from our last clinical. nursing school has ruined me. thought you would appreciate this.
I don't drink so I see St. Patty's as an LSD type of day. Its like a more hardcore 420
i think dick pics are a sign of a sexual renaissance
It's not even close to Halloween but there is a girl in a nurses outfit. Twerk or twat.
Agreed then we'll really be on our A game tomorrow. And by A I mean alcohol.
I will never look at a penis the same again. After that I will appreciate them so much more than I do. Makes me wanna kiss yours just for being pretty
Well if I can't snuggle you, I might as well snuggle a stranger's cat.
He referred to our sex as "an Olympic event." My tits are bruised.
Mike fell asleep with his hand down my pants. I'm clearly an enticing person.
WHAT THE FUCK HAPPENED. WHO CAME HOME WITH ME. WHAT THE FUCK RESPOND ASAP I AM SO CONFUSED
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