Pish posh, there's never a bad time to eat food off my body.
my ex just saw me in his brothers bed. fuck yes revenge feels good
So, when he came he screamed MORTAL KOMBAT!!!! at the top of his lungs and all of his roomates yelled back FINISH HER!!!!.....yeah kinda akward
My patience ran out after you started clapping at the strippers everytime they took off a piece of clothing.
HOLY SHIT HE'S TRYING TO EAT HIS FOOT. THIS IS THE BEST DAY OF MY LIFE.
She wasnt impressed wen i brought a guy for her back with me, a 3am impromptu sperm donor is not a gd birthday present. Im a bad gf.
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
I just took the cheapest shot in your honor
I CAN ONLY BE THE BIRDIE ON YOUR SHOULDER WHO LEADS YOU INTO BAD DESCISIONS
You have the most beautiful penis I've ever seen. I never thought penises were meant to be beautiful, but you proved me wrong
Pretty sure keeping my vibrator in the same drawer with the weed makes it work better. I fall asleep almost immedi
I mean, it's a romantic picture of pubes if I've ever seen one
It was all good until his cat started licking my nipple along with him
yeah, i thought because of the nature of his job he would have been better at it, but i guess there's a difference between a bagpipe and vagina
This is why I should’ve just stuck with blow jobs. I’m good at blow jobs. Blow jobs never fail me.
Randomize
