you can still come hang out if you want
I really don't feel like watching you play video games
So now everyone thinks I don't know what a condom is
you know you're not getting laid when you start breaking awkward silences with quotes from Robot Chicken
how do you tell a roommate that having sex on your bottom bunk is not appropriate even if she has a top bunk that's hard to climb to?
So the guy sitting next to me is watching dungeons and dragons on youtube. I didnt realize you could get more pathetic than actually playing the game.
Just woke to a Christmas wrapped pack of hotdogs in my bathtub. How high did we get?
there were more penises there than on chat roulette
Its really not funny anymore. I need to stop shaving while i'm drunk
Not till Sunday. I'm going to sleep in my car. And I know. This place is insane. Blood on the stAirs 5 dollar slices of pizza. A girl on our floor had a stroke.
Looking forward to meeting the person naked and passed out at my kitchen table.
I lied. Can't workout today. Only exercises I'm currently capable of doing are breathing ones to keep last night's drinks ending up all over the classroom.
I don't send those kind of pictures unless the recipient has already been up close and personal with it. I don't give previews, but I will provide recaps.
Had to drive my booty call home because he had an asthma attack after we had sex .. How was your night?
Did you come home, throw out a ton of shoes, then leave again?
That is exactly what I did.
I'd still fuck that
You'd fuck a dead moose
Quite possible
Randomize
