Call me so I can make it juicy for ya
i like that octo mom she is my favorite xmen
If I don't come home tonight, I've died in a pile of gay.
I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
ive decided theres a fine line between accepting money for sex and letting someone buy you late night taco bell and knowing that if he hadnt you wouldnt be in his bed right now
And next time, don't pick a fight with me when you're naked. That's just not fair
it's ok. you also told me I can feel free to vomit on your blow dryer sometime.
The sex I just had was not worth missing a girls night out.
We looked at pictures of a Texas banjo contest from 2006 for a half hour and then were surprised by who won. That stoned.
There's a 35% chance I'm still residually drunk from last night.
And you say you're not good with numbers...
Pretty sure I just became my mom's wingman
If I could sit on this toilet forever I would totally do that right now
he kissed both of us goodnight when we dropped him off...I didn't know if I was more offended or impressed
So Blakes coming home... so if youre like fingerbanging the shit out of yourself on the kitchen table...wrap it up
a reward? ill think of something
if its not drugs or food I swear to god ill throw a fit
Randomize
