the cure to his relationship is in or around my vagina.
rubbing her clit was like playing thumb war
I just made what I can safely estimate to be a 900 calorie pb&j. Fuck a serving size.
explain the missing patches of hair on my cat. now.
You took it upon yourself to rid the world of them, and by that I mean you dressed up as Batman and started kicking them in the shins.
My dick was almost in plain McDonald's sight
That amazing moment when the girl in the passenger seat decides to strip you while your driving.
Still dying that you shit outside
As planned I took it to the limit. Then we met a new limit. Now they are limit friends.
New war strategy! The ex-girlfriend of my ex-girlfriend is now my twice a week booty call!
I need to get all the one night tinders in my system before I move back in with my parents
You tried to use him as a battering ram. I'm 99% certain that's why he left.
I have 3 bottles of vodka in my room telling me not to go to work tomorrow.
hey u leave my anime porn out of this
I just remembered that I insisted everyone watch porn together last night.
Randomize
