She wanted to watch a Baby Einstein DVD while we fucked. I'm pretty open minded but that felt a little creepy.
So I put about 15 worms in the cuervo bottle. I don't think that's how it works but I feel like hallucinating by 11am
if your not going to answer your phone this is just going to be an embarrassment tomorrow
WHATEVER CLASS IS PLAYING "TOOT IT AND BOOT IT" AT 8:30 IN THE MORNING, I WANT IN.
Honestly, It follows the same rules as Cock Roulette.
He is the one I "technically" lost my virginity to.
I feel like you never had a virginity..
What a dumb baby whore.
And they were awkwardly all over each other in a Christian way.
There is a really great story behind the missing Coco Puffs and vodka mystery
i'm pretty sure i can feel a baby kicking just looking at him. if he didnt impregnate you, you officially have an iron-clad uterus.
Both of our knuckles were split open this morning when I came out of the blackout, the column on the porch has two new cracks in it, were like the redneck Super Smash Bros.
just for future reference, lake water is NOT mix for hard stuff. nor is it an adequate substitute.
No. DON'T DO IT. Friends don't let friends fuck clowns.
BRING THE BAGELS
I ended up in th ER yelling my height weight and age
Randomize
