YOURE GIVING A BLOW JOB TO THE BOY WHO SAYS "OH SNAP"
I just saw someone marching around outside wearing only a loincloth, dragging a fuckton of sheet metal. Spring has Sprung.
We just got really drunk and bought toilet paper. Successful Monday.
Please don't drown this weekend. It would be a shame to lose a dick like yours.
I just laid my head on this pillow and I smelt your penis. It was comforting.
I will pre answer that I did not see it the fun way. He was peeing outside.
Dude. I'm super jealous I'm not there. Plus I look really pretty tonight, I'm wearing my long blue dress, I have long blonde hair, and I'm just sitting here hitting Larry the Long Bong. I'll pretend like your 3 spirits are floating in my smoke. Fuck.
I'm sending you the three minute video I jus took,....it's of me eating a pear up close
He was literally going down on me and giving me a foot rub AT THE SAME TIME. What more can I ask for?
I'd say it's his fault for never running us through proper protocol for "catching your RA in the middle of him banging some girl"
Wine is the only reason I'm making it in the real world
Dude. I need you to practice dancing around in your banana hamock. Party boy style. I'll call later with details.
It was a fun night! I woke up with a boyfriend, again....
We got cut off at the bar, but it's okay because I tactically rolled behind the bar and grabbed a bottle of whiskey. Meet me in the back booth when you're done puking in the bathroom. This is about to get real slutty.
I’m sorry I pressured you for dick pics.
Randomize
