in pain and im wearing pink underwear
so?
i dont own pink underwear
if creeping was an olympic sport, i would be a lock for the gold right now.
If there was a creeper hall of fame you and me would be the first two inductees
The sun is out and the snow is finally starting to melt here... Vodka bottles keep popping up everywhere. Guess it's the college version of burying nuts for the winter
Just look for the house with the beer knights.
Yes, do intervene. Unless it involves cowboys with loud trucks and hard 9 inch dicks. Then just come back for me in the morning.
I just found scrambled eggs in my shower. Thanks for that, asshole.
i admit it was a weird experience, but why regret what once made you cum
Good thing I took the morning after pill cuz I pretty much had packaged seamen in me like I was a squirrel saving it for later or something
Nobody has seen her in 3 days. Should we call the cops or hope this is just another drunk Carmen San Diego game she's playing?
I'm using the bullet from my cock ring to massage out my tmj lock jaw from giving too much head.
I can affiliate each flavor of Copenhagen to a different one night stand. I really love Texas.
Most desperate stoner moment; dropped our hard earned resin ball in the sand, rinsed it off and then did knife hits in the kitchen cuz we broke our only pipe
I woke up with my face covered in mustard. Your mom said I ate hotdogs like a pornstar
WHO DOES THAT ON A TUESDAY? This is not a Drake joke, the girl doesn't turn up OR down. She doesn't do anything.
Randomize
