Fyi mom and I voted and you're the DD tonight, congratulations
why would she cut her hair? she needs all the distractions possible from those texas-sized gums and horse teeth.
Just found out my brother beats off to Lauren Conrad. the Hills will never be the same.
She just said she wanted to get freaky and left the room. I'm almost certain I just heard the microwave.
The bar posted my picture because my name changes with each new fake i get. i'm getting a wig.
idk but i have you stored in my phone as 'guy with beard doing body shots'
No, this is a senior booty call. It cannot be ignored.
2nd fun fact: he has a square tan line around his dick.
Also we saw a clown getting arrested. Rochester is weird.
If I don't go to Australia I'm using that towards a new car. If I do I'll use it to buy a koala.
First time since we broke up that I'm not drunk before noon...win for broken hearts everywhere
Atleast we had sex on the couch before your ex took it from you
Do toy wanna orseer frim onedof tjose plaves? Sry textimg with globes on
Gloves*
Out of all the words to correct, you chose gloves??
He's a downgrade and it was quick. But it was dick nonetheless.
Just because I'm asexual doesn't mean I can't have a revenge fuck.
Randomize
