I don't smoke a lot but now and then I do. Weed and I are like still standing naked in a bathroom together deciding if we should blow one another or bolt for the exit. An awkward relationship.
When you come back do you think I could print anorexic pictures of Mary-Kate?
I got a lap dance until she said they wipe of the poles between each dance to clear the "std slime", i couldnt even masterbate at home it was a horrible military monday
Her best friend sent her a random hate text and the song they played at her father's funeral came on the radio. I just got cock blocked by the universe
with your flexibility, and the size of my penis, amazing things are possible.
since i'm not going, you must continue my tradition of flashing every person there.
I'm not sure if you saw my recent facebook update, but I have already put the Radio Flyer wagon to good use. I had someone pull me to the nearest bar.
This is probably the only time in my life I'm going to be able to say I'm going to the hospital too smoke weed and play Mario kart.
I got us a lift home. Payment may require me giving road head, are you cool just chilling in the back seat pretending to be oblivious to this happening?
Yes and yes. Got taken to a Florida strip club. I desperately want to flood my eyes and ears with hand sanitizer right now.
They got me high and left me at the mall with a giftcard for $400. I need an adult.
Ok, they now been on the roof for two days. I can see 4 cases of teecate and a carton of smokes. They are yelling at "fucking fall" and pissing off the roof.
Come to my pity party. It's being hosted in my basement. The theme is ambiguously sexual cuddling and wine.
She's like the King Midas of sexual confusion. Everything she touches turns to gay.
I don't know if I'm more excited about sex or that I have an excuse to smoke a cigarette
Randomize
