Lonely and bored. Am I allowed to play Dance Dance Revolution by myself?
How you know a guy is gay: they say they would want money, not sexual favors, from emma watson
She has never blacked out. I have tried to get her to so many times. Apparently it's a lot harder than we make it out to be.
idk whats worse playing power hour to yourself, or the fact that you were having fun while doing it
He spent 6 hours at the ER after crashing a motorcycle and still came to the bar, Ofcourse I went home with him. He's my hero.
Bought two parrots for us. I'm keeping them at the Bellagio.
I resisted the temptation to hold the cake in one hand to alternate bites with the ruffles I was eating. I decided that might make me look dysfunctional.
He hasn't responded, but he probably just jizzed in his shorts again, so I'll give him time.
I never woulda thought that back in kindergarten playong kickball that'd i'd be 24 getting plastered in front of the white house and winning a kickball championship in a young adult drinking league
All I see when I think of you are dancing penis angels around your head.
And then you refused to pee in anything but a sink
Basically I will actually need a reindeer pulled sleigh to make it to all the penises in one night.
So apparently, after 11 beers, 2 pitchers of sangria and 3 rhum & cokes, the idea of popping a load of MD and jumping on the trampoline, in the woods, in my underwear was the best one ever.
I got arrested FOR running from the cops. In college Dad got arrested and THEN ran from the cops. So it could be worse.
Put on my pants to go to work and discovered they had melted.
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