she was definitely a virgin. no ones that bad unless theyre a virgin
your sister was..
Does the phrase 'traumatizing near-threesome' mean anything to you.
We welcome drunken adversity.
With open legs.
I was in the library and saw 2 dudes hackysacking in a study room with 3 girls working. I asked if I could join; as soon as I closed the door the chicks offered me tequila shots. study session w/everyone cancelled, I'm busy.
Today is leap day..... If that's not an excuse to blackout all day I don't know what is
Seriously! We need to take her a thank you note or something. She puts up with the drugs and the extremely loud sex. She deserves a thank you card.
After your flask fell out of your leg brace and you told your RA that it was juice, you tried to unlock your dorm room but your key was attached to your bra so he ended up seeing your boobs
The bouncer was just about to kick Sarah out for getting with this guy 'too physically'. I told him that was 'her style' and he let them stay. Banter.
I just sat in the bathtub with the shower running so I could eat the whole box of mega stuffed Oreos. What am I doing with my life
Yeah i just finished watching someone play ping pong with his penis it didn't fully register until after a few seconds
He was the only one not on Xanax so he holds the key to what actually happened last night
Maybe because you rubbed my clit while we were making churros
I renamed some of my contacts in my phone before passing out and I have one I cant figure out, its "fucking house elf scum"
How'd your date go last night?
Well I blacked out at 1:30 and woke up naked in not-my-date's bed with an uneaten Jimmy John's sandwich.
We just fucked in the park on a bench and a guy with a dog walked past us and the dog walked right up to us while the guy stared at his phone.
Randomize
