After going down on me he either said "there, it's over" or "there's an odor"... I couldn't hear him and was too embarrassed to ask him to repeat himself. I just got dressed, grabbed my bag, and left. So I don't think there's gunna be a second date. =(
i feel like even strangers are annoyed with me because of how drunk i was last night
We woke up next to each other with a mutual look of disgust, and then he left. I knew I should have gone for the younger brother.
there should be a national holiday dedicated to how high i am
yeah, it's no longer just 'day drinking' when it's 5pm and you're knocking over fruit displays at fresh market
You know its a good sign when a girl asks who everyone is AFTER she flashes her tits to the room.
I'm going to make out with someone. I'm on a mission. I don't even care if I'm wearing beer goggles. As long as he's not shorter than me, gay, or a woman.
CALL 911 HAND IS STUCK IN THE GARBAGE DISPOSAL. HELP
Do we still have any pizza left from last night?
sooo trippy being back in town after 5 years. if you had asked me in high school who would be future coke heads, i would have been way off
I mean it's a good blow job, but it's not worth the four hour round trip.
I want to be "performing a disservice to society by actually wearing clothes in public" hot.
you can't let guys come on your chest and then hog my blanket
Is texting an old booty call with "can you still get your ankles behind your ears?" an appropriate way to reemerge into the singles scene???
My ultimate hope is that people will hug me, smell me, and therefore think I'm classy.
It doesn't matter how nice the shirt you wore to the bar was, you still shouldn't have worn it to a job interview
Randomize
