Cute you're picking friends over dick. I feel like this is the trailer for a lifetime movie.
She helped me organize my comics and then blew me. This is the one.
No. Her boobs are the one spot of warmth in my life right now and I will not let you take them from me.
I was in the bathroom puking up mountains of tequila and when he came to help me, I held the door shut and kept yelling at him to let me be a lady.
You should try cooking mac & cheese naked sometime. It's quite relaxing.
I don't have any money, so I'm just gonna press my boobs against him for his birthday.
I'm auditing financial statements and ur growing weed this is bullshit how did this happen to me
Is it just me or does the sex still keep getting better? I wasn't crying, my eyes just watered from how hard I was cumming.
Both of our knuckles were split open this morning when I came out of the blackout, the column on the porch has two new cracks in it, were like the redneck Super Smash Bros.
well i don't NEED my liver but it's nice to have one when you're trying to have a good time
she said she just "wanted a guy who she could cook breakfast for". HUGE MISTAKE. I'm never leaving
He shampooed and conditioned his pubes but can't manscape for shit.
I woke up naked in a tent. I was more upset that the air mattress had deflated.
It was an entirely appropriate time and place for sexual thoughts.
That doesn't make it ok to play by play me your honeymoon!
I either have a problem or a really good solution... I just ordered my homecoming dress off of a website that sells forplay outfits.
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