Being alone has allowed me to flourish into a complete weirdo
So I'm driving and this guy next to me at the stop light is reving his engine and honking at me. Motherfucker thinks that's because I'm asian and drive a honda I'm automatically going to race him
vodka and carrot juice, if im gonna drink i at least got my 8 servings of vegetable
she was masturbating to a video of herself masturbaing. She's a keeper
It's official drugs can't kill me
The last thing I want is a chocolate mold of my cock competing with my real cock for time spent in your mouth
I think the name vodka for a girl is amazing
He just walked from his house to mine. Walked in and asked for a hug and then left.. And he's sober.
In the future, could you not call me 'bro' while we're having sex?
It's Been a while since I puked in vomit bush. I hope it doesn't feel neglected
I was telling everyone at the frat that they had to try the "fantastic refreshment" that was everclear, vodka and country time
I think someone tried to make a huge bowl of ramen in my bathtub. There's noodles everywhere in my bathroom.
I don't know if I want to fuck him or punch him in the face.
He's honking my boob in his sleep
It's innocent and endearing in some way
For someone who's supposed to be gay Greg is really good at seducing me into things I don't wanna do
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