First thing she said after sex was.. are you baptised by chance?
She said she couldnt do it today but shed make it up to me next week
stick it in her butt and if she asks, say that thats what you thought she meant
I feel uncockblockable...banged her in the bathroom with my iv still in
I don't care if shes your sisters age. Once someone is on my to do list theres only one way to get them off it
Just FYI, I'm breaking up with my boyfriend tonight and you need to be on call to be my first rebound bang
When I ask you to make sure no ones coming while I'm changing.. The logical friend would keep watch. But you my, best friend come stand in front of me and flash everybody.
Caught in the act of lying. Lipstick literally all over his dick. He tried to make some story about darkwing duck or some shit but failed to realize he is a complete moron.
OH MY GOD DO YOU REMEMBER WISHBONE? DO YOU REMEMBER THAT LITTLE BITCH? WHAT'S THE STORY WISHBONE
I have a surprise for you
Is it drugs? I want drugs. Or a puppy!
I should be free tonight unless my 5 speed vibrator arrives in the mail today, than we might have scheduling conflicts.
You've lost booty call privileges between the hours of 10pm and 8am.
Any man who can do squats while fucking you is a man worth keeping.
He flew in from NY last night. We had sex in the back of my car in the airport parking lot and then he fed me fresh Babka (from Breads Bakery) as I drove him home. I can't decide if I love him or Babka more.
Cheyanne in woods. Ducks attacked. My toe is bleeding. We are gpsing our way home on foot. No worries
they were drunk. and loud. and now they're drunk and quiet. or dead, you never know.
Randomize
