After going down on me he either said "there, it's over" or "there's an odor"... I couldn't hear him and was too embarrassed to ask him to repeat himself. I just got dressed, grabbed my bag, and left. So I don't think there's gunna be a second date. =(
you dont remember trying to break dance in the middle of the casino floor on ur own throw up?
oh that explains alot.
What's the protocol for seeing the two girls you've been sleeping with in the store WHILE buying condoms?
3some
You're right, stupid question.
There is so much to learn about oneself from autofill.
when "blow-job jen" drunk dials you at 3 in the morning, you answer
Why did I wake up holding food tongs?
You're in the clear; you and Andrew did not joint fingerbang that girl on the dance floor last night.
The US State Dept doesn't need to know I'm a high strung drunken whore.
I feel like when purchasing hard liquor on a Monday I also need to buy a happy 21st bday card to not seem so pathetic
The problem with that is that my car has been stolen
i know i shouldn't tell you this since i want you to really like me but i just spent the last 4 hours sleeping on the toilet.
I sold him an eighth while trippin balls wearin my girlfriends tutu and tube top. and i was talking about albinos the entire time
well, he defiantly picked the right guy to buy drugs from
dude, no lie, I would make out with you in front of them wearing nothing but a rainbow colored speedo
I spent half an hour sculpting my pubes into a perfect triangle of really short hair, and the first thing he said when he saw it was "Don't you think you need a shave?"
I basically spent the entire weekend in bed with that red head.Every time I tried to leave she got me too horny to think straight. I was kidnapped by vagina
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